Hee Hee I'm Responsible XD

So yay today is my birthday and as you may have gathered from the title I am now 18 which means I'm an adult and therefore responsible. Which in all honesty is quite funny.

So yes I haven't updated for ages!! Certainly not for the whole March Break. What I have done so far:

- pretty much no homework. Which isn't really good.

- Went to Toronto yesterday with our friends from Michigan who came up Wednesday.

- Had a two day long Fife Retreat and slept over at the fort.

- Went to see my Grandma for Birthday week.

- STARTED my homework at 9:00 last night and got about 2 minutes of it done.

- Read three and a half books.

- Actually put all of my books on a temporary shelf in my room. I'm surprised they all fit. I didn't think they would.

- Went to visit my aunt and spent the day with her.

- Went to five malls looking for a prom dress.

- FOUND A PROM DRESS IT IS GORGEOUS!!!!!! 

And today I:

- Woke up early and had a shower. Was denied the right to straighten my hairs.

- Started watching Across The Universe. Was denied the right to finish it.

- Briefly talked to Justin before he left to go Go-carting with his cousin.

- Went to Dollarama to buy stuff for Justin and I's party (hmmmm that sounds grammatically incorrect. I wonder what it really should  be . . . . )

- Bought Justin's birthday present and wrapped it.

- Opened presents from my family and from my Grandparents currently at the Grand Canyon

- Talked to my Aunt and her partner in England via webcam and got my present from them. (YAY I'm going to England in the summer to see them!!!)

- Got yelled at. Guess turning 18 changed nothing.

- Cleaned up the house. Ditto.

- Started learning a piece from the Phantom of the Opera Piano book I got for my birthday. I have learned 8 bars so far. I'm proud.

yep. That's been my birthday. I'm planning on going to a movie with Justin later today. We wanted to go see an 18A movie just because we can, so we're going to see I Love You, Man. But I dunno if it's actually going to happen because I dunno when he's getting home from Go-carting and I dunno if his mother's going to let him. So, I should go and do more homework seeing as I have loads to do. I'll let you know when something happens.

So sweetly she bade me adieu,

     I thought that she bade me return.

March 11, 2009

-Stayed home sick

-Napped

-Got a call from Justin asking how I was (so sweet)

-Watched Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

-Made instant noodles and ate them

-Wrote a like 7 page paper

-Drank tea

-Ate some lasagna

-Bit my tongue open and now it hurts like hell

-Watched the Little Rascals

-Fell in love with Uh-huh and Buckwheat

-Taught clarinet (so now yay I have money)

yup yup that's pretty much been my day

Auugh.

Auugh. So this particular entry is gonna be quite short compared to my other ones. I just really can't get how I feel into words. Even to describe it to myself. Ever get like that?? Well, it sucks. Basically, I'm being yelled at for EVERYTHING at home. And I mean EVERYTHING. Seriously. My sister's headboard won't fit properly on her bed so my dad has to cut it down and he cuts it wrong: My Fault. The waterbed isn't draining properly and so it took all night to fully drain: My Fault. My mother's pants are on the floor in her room: My Fault. 

It's really getting to the point where I'm getting pissed off. And, of course, I tell Justin these things because who else can a girl rant to if not her boyfriend?? And, thank god for me, he's a natural psychologist or psychiatrist or whatever you want to call it. He's that. Seriously. Bring him ANY problem and he'll come up with some fucking amazing metaphor or something that just tells you what's wrong or what you need to do or what others need to do or whatever you need. He knows. Even if it's some problem that he could never have experienced, he knows. He's literally a genius. It's too bad in order to be a psychiatrist you need like, 4000 degrees. Otherwise he'd be going to school for it. The day someone decided the requirements for psychology is the day the world lost a great psychiatrist. 

But anyways. I tell Justin these things and he talks to his parents. I wish I had that kind of relationship with my parents. Imagine, actually being able to TALK to your parents without them fucking yelling at you every third sentence. Justin's mom says that if this kind of stuff keeps going on, it's only a matter of time until I snap. And before, I was kind of like "Uh-huh. Yep. Ok sure, whatever." But now, I can see it's actually happening to me. I'm crying WAY more often than I was before. I can actually see myself deteriorating. But you know, my parents really aren't helping. It really doesn't make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside to be told what shelter you're going to be brought to if you do one more thing they see as wrong. Shocking, you say?? That can't be true, you say?? Au contraire. I shall be sent to the Choices Youth Shelter on 59 Town line in Orangeville, Ontario, Canada. (519) 942-5970 in case you were wondering. Comforting, isn't it?? 

But Justin won't let that happen. He's so . . . . sweet. Really. The first time I told him that he said to me: Can I call you back in 5 minutes?? I said sure and when he had called me back he had already told his parents that if I ever needed him, EVER, he was to be excused from whatever he was doing so he could come and pick me up and bring me to his house. And his mother is so nice. She invites me over there or sends Justin over whenever she can because she knows I can't stand being in this house alone with my family for much more than 24 hours. I really owe so much to them. And she's always asking how I am. Really. So sweet. 

And I've been this close [-----] to getting kicked out so many times. Threatened, more like it, but anyways, the threats work. But I know one day they really are going to kick me out. And when they pick up the phone to call the shelter you know what I'm going to do?? I'm going to grab the phone right out of their hands and I'm going to call Justin. Then I'm going to walk out of the house and wait for him at the end of my street. I even packed a bag two weeks ago because I thought I was going to be out of the house by the end of the week. 

Auugh. That is literally how I feel. Auugh. Actually, I've written way more than I thought I was going to originally. This blogging stuff is really good for writing it all down. I could keep on writing for like, two hours but I should probably get off now. If anything happens, I'll let you know.

So sweetly she bade me adieu,

     I thought that she bade me return.

The Ditch

yes so this is the crucial time between success and failure. I know that I haven't really been updating recently, and I apologize for that. And I know that if I don't really get into this updating thing, I'll get bored of it and stop. And the whole point of starting this thing was to keep it going, so I know I can't stop now. I must prevail.

Yes. The keyboard I'm using is incredibly fucked and won't function properly. Especially with the CAPS LOCK key, which is what I use for a capital. I don't do the whole shift thing. It doen't work for me. Dunno why, but it doesn't. Yes, so for all of my sentences in which I need a capital, the stupid key gets stuck and doesn't register the first time I hit it, so I get sentences that end up looking like this: hEY IT'S ME AND OMG i'M REALLY PISSED OFF AT THE STUPID KEYBOARD. Yup yup. That's my life.

Anyways, me and Justin have FINALLY worked out when our party's going to be. I don't remember if I mentioned that we're having a combined party. Actually, now that I think of it, I think I did. Anyways. Its on the 21st of March so that should be cool. I'll be 18 by then so woot for me. We're going kosmic bowling and doing other such coolio things. We've decided to make a video invitation and I still have to finish editing that.

Good news!!! The Martin's are coming over for some of the March Break so that will be AWESOMENESS. I haven't seen Jonathan in like, 5 or 6 months. Hmmmmm. That reminds me (and this will make NO sense to you but anyways . . . . ), I have to get him and ant farm . . . . I think I'll explain that one next time.

You know, I really don't know why I haven't updated in like 15 days. I really don't have an excuse. Well, my mother does make sure that cleaning the fucking house takes up about 85% of my life. Anyways.

On to the next subject!!! Wow, I really don't do transitional things do I?? But anyways, MORE good news!!! Mallory is going to be coming to Hall on Tuesdays from now on and she's going to be giving be like, 20 minute lesson things every week. For free!!! But really just like tone and technique and such. But I really do need that sort of thing anyways so I guess it's worth it.

Crap. Bell rang. I'll talk to you later then. :)

So sweetly she bade me adieu,

     I thought that she bade me return.